As someone who's half-white, half-Asian (and looks predominantly Asian) I often hear questions like "where are you from? Like, where are your parents from?"
I'm not sure I see this as a 'micro-agression.' Or aggression at all, it's just a question. People ask me where my ancestors came from, and I tell them Scotland and Finland. No big deal. It's pretty clear I'm not native american.
Sometimes I also get asked where I grew up. I tell them. Nosy people. If you don't want people to be curious about details in your life, that's kind of anti-social.
I'm not sure I see this as a 'micro-agression.' Or aggression at all, it's just a question.
You should watch the video. I've seen it (and others before). The issue isn't asking where you are from, it's the non-caucasion person saying they are from "here", and having that answer dismissed/disbelieved and then being asked "No, where are your parents from".
It's a subtle racism that assumes that people who don't look like you can't really have been born on there same country as you.
The issue isn't asking where you are from, it's the non-caucasion person saying they are from "here", and having that answer dismissed/disbelieved and then being asked "No, where are your parents from".
I understand your problem, but you are minimizing my pain.
What non-caucasian people don't understand is that caucasian people get asked annoying questions too. It's not fun. We can't label it as microagressions or racism though. We just have to endure the pain.
If that sounds like "whining of an entitled person" to you, well, your whining sounds just the same. Microagressions. Life is annoying, people ask annoying questions. They notice things that are different. Then they notice things that are the same, and we all become a big happy family. Unless we get too caught up in blaming each other.
What non-caucasian people don't understand is that caucasian people get asked annoying questions too. It's not fun. We can't label it as microagressions or racism though. We just have to endure the pain.
I think you are missing the point. It is not being asked "annoying things", it is a phrasing of a question/ statement that ventures into disrespect of the person being addressed. There is no reason why that sort of behavior should just be accepted.
For example do you think that it is reasonable to "cat call" women as they walk down the street? Do you think that the women should just "put up with it" as it is only annoying? Or should the people performing the act behave differently?
Yet it is still there and it is still disrespectful. Why should you have to put up with any disrespect?
The person asking still respects you.
If people are systemically and continually "unintentionally" phrasing things in a disrespectful manner, then I would posit that no, they do not respect you.
If people are systemically and continually "unintentionally" phrasing things in a disrespectful manner, then I would posit that no, they do not respect you.
Well, that is where you are wrong.
However, I will tell you that you, OzPeter, I do not respect you.
Why? Because you are acting like troll-bait, by your actions and words.
When someone says or does something that is annoying to you, ask him politely to change, let him know that it annoys you. If he continues, then you have a problem.
This is interpersonal relations 101, people annoy each other, and how to deal with it. You don't need to wrap it up with racism and sexism.
Where are your ancestors from? (Score:4, Insightful)
As someone who's half-white, half-Asian (and looks predominantly Asian) I often hear questions like "where are you from? Like, where are your parents from?"
I'm not sure I see this as a 'micro-agression.' Or aggression at all, it's just a question. People ask me where my ancestors came from, and I tell them Scotland and Finland. No big deal. It's pretty clear I'm not native american.
Sometimes I also get asked where I grew up. I tell them. Nosy people. If you don't want people to be curious about details in your life, that's kind of anti-social.
Re: (Score:4, Informative)
I'm not sure I see this as a 'micro-agression.' Or aggression at all, it's just a question.
You should watch the video. I've seen it (and others before). The issue isn't asking where you are from, it's the non-caucasion person saying they are from "here", and having that answer dismissed/disbelieved and then being asked "No, where are your parents from".
It's a subtle racism that assumes that people who don't look like you can't really have been born on there same country as you.
Re:Where are your ancestors from? (Score:2)
The issue isn't asking where you are from, it's the non-caucasion person saying they are from "here", and having that answer dismissed/disbelieved and then being asked "No, where are your parents from".
I understand your problem, but you are minimizing my pain.
What non-caucasian people don't understand is that caucasian people get asked annoying questions too. It's not fun. We can't label it as microagressions or racism though. We just have to endure the pain.
If that sounds like "whining of an entitled person" to you, well, your whining sounds just the same. Microagressions. Life is annoying, people ask annoying questions. They notice things that are different. Then they notice things that are the same, and we all become a big happy family. Unless we get too caught up in blaming each other.
Re: (Score:2)
What non-caucasian people don't understand is that caucasian people get asked annoying questions too. It's not fun. We can't label it as microagressions or racism though. We just have to endure the pain.
I think you are missing the point. It is not being asked "annoying things", it is a phrasing of a question/ statement that ventures into disrespect of the person being addressed. There is no reason why that sort of behavior should just be accepted.
For example do you think that it is reasonable to "cat call" women as they walk down the street? Do you think that the women should just "put up with it" as it is only annoying? Or should the people performing the act behave differently?
Re: (Score:2)
it is a phrasing of a question/ statement that ventures into disrespect of the person being addressed.
The disrespectful phrasing is unintentional. The person asking still respects you.
That is, unless you get defensive and upset. Then they might not respect you.
Re: (Score:2)
The disrespectful phrasing is unintentional.
Yet it is still there and it is still disrespectful. Why should you have to put up with any disrespect?
The person asking still respects you.
If people are systemically and continually "unintentionally" phrasing things in a disrespectful manner, then I would posit that no, they do not respect you.
Re: (Score:2)
If people are systemically and continually "unintentionally" phrasing things in a disrespectful manner, then I would posit that no, they do not respect you.
Well, that is where you are wrong.
However, I will tell you that you, OzPeter, I do not respect you. Why? Because you are acting like troll-bait, by your actions and words.
Re: (Score:2)
This is interpersonal relations 101, people annoy each other, and how to deal with it. You don't need to wrap it up with racism and sexism.
Re: (Score:1)
I don't, but I also don't think it's reasonable to inject straw men into a discussion. The intent is far different.